You should go and love yourself

I’ve been struggling with my ability to trust in myself for a long time and lately it’s really been put to the test. I am however a firm believer that everything that challenges us, is also helping us grow.

The relationship we have with ourselves is, after all, the most important one we’ll ever have and while I don’t think a life without love for other people is a life worth living, I do know that in order to have any successful relations with anyone else you must first love yourself. There is simply no way around it. It’s hard but it’s absolutely possible. All you need is practice, practice and some more practice.

In hard times I turn to Pinterest for some inspiration and confidence boosts and I’ve put together a collage of my favorite quotes and mantras. Most of them are simple and can seem so obvious but we need a reminder every once in a while.

FacebookpinterestFacebookpinterest

Sitting with pain

A few weeks ago, I was listening to an episode of yoga girls podcast where she and her mom talked about pain. They mentioned something that stuck with me, probably because it resonated with me so much. They talked about the ability to sit with pain and the importance of being able to sit with pain.

I’ve been completely unable to sit with pain. The thought of sitting with the pain I feel, feeling those feelings fully and not distract myself with anything feels absolutely impossible to me. I will either try to fix everything right away or I will distract myself so much that the distraction itself becomes destructive. Trying to fix the cause of the pain might sound like a good thing, and at some point it is. I am at the center a positive soul and a fighter. I will never ever give up on what matters to me and that is a beautiful trait that I will never excuse.

However, using “fixing” as a band-aid, instead of feeling what hurts is not healthy. You have to feel it in order to heal. Otherwise, you don’t get the realizations you need in order to actually do everything you can to fix the problem and heal the pain for real.

This is something I’ve learned from my boyfriend, long before I listened to yoga girl talking about it. He has been able to sit with pain and he claimed it to be necessary in order to heal and feel better. That sounded insane to me at first but now I get it. The things I’ve learned from that boy are many. He doesn’t realize it of course and neither do I at first. But when I am forced to just stop and think, it hits me and I can’t help but think how grateful I am for finding someone that not only loves me but challenge my otherwise so monotonous brain.

I’m in the middle of pain as I write this and the reasons are not relevant to this post. I spent all morning trying to “fix everything”, desperately doing anything to ease that pain that scares me so much. Then I realized the only way for me to fix anything is to feel what hurts and learn from it. It is not easy. It is pretty fucking terrifying. But it is absolutely necessary.

All pain that we feel is transforming and healing, even if it doesn’t feel like that when you’re in the middle of it. My constant escape from pain and obsessive need to find the cure to everything has deprived me of the lessons the pain could have taught me.

I always used to have this fantasy of the perfect life and especially the perfect relationship. I felt like if something bad happened or if I went through a struggle it was ruined forever. Like nothing was allowed to crack that perfect facade or it wouldn’t be real. I couldn’t have been more wrong. The cracks are what shapes us, as individuals and as a couple. The cracks are what makes it REAL. As Ernest Hemmingway so nicely put it: “We are all broken. That’s how the light gets in.” A perfect facade with no cracks is not real at all.

What’s important in this, however, is to learn from every crack in the facade of the beautiful house we build together. The cracks teach us about ourselves and each other and you need to see them for what they are in order to fix them. When you learn from the cracks you’re able to fill them in with what’s needed and you have the knowledge you need to prevent the facade from cracking too much. Because we all strive for a smooth facade and we all do what we can to keep it smooth. The lesson is not to stop striving for a strong house but to accept that all houses have flaws and that is what makes it beautiful and unique.

As you read this post you may wonder what kind of mushroom I had for breakfast. Or you might resonate with these thoughts and feelings I expose in this post. Writing it down is helpful to me in this practice of sitting with pain and learning from my mistakes. Note, LEARNING from my mistakes, never punish myself for it. We are all just human and we all want well but the ability to learn from the pain and the mistakes you might have made is crucial for making it better.

Lots of love <3

FacebookpinterestFacebookpinterest

Yesterday’s

Hello dear friends!

Yesterday we celebrated my brothers 17th birthday with the family. It was really cozy and I’m still suffering from the food coma…

My patient brother took a billion pictures of me because I was very satisfied with my outfit and wanted to show you here on the blog. I hope you’re all having a cozy Sunday!

Dress from Mango (old) // Shoes from Superga // Earrings (made myself from two tassels)

He might hate me for posting these but seriously, someone give this guy a modeling contract…

FacebookpinterestFacebookpinterest

Roadtrippin’

Hello dear friends!

Last weekend I went to Sweden with Bogdan. We stayed in my moms apartment in Helsingborg and on Saturday we took the car and went on a roadtrip along the coast. We went to Höganäs to shop at Lager 157 and we stopped along the way in Domsten and Viken. The sights were beautiful and I couldn’t help thinking about how badly I wanna live by the sea. It’s been a dream of mine for as long as I can remember. The sea just makes me so calm and happy.

Here are some pictures from our roadtrip!

 

I’m posting these pictures with the risk of my mom seeing that I borrowed her shirt after swearing I wouldn’t touch her clothes…

FacebookpinterestFacebookpinterest

same, same but different

Hello dear friends,

There is nothing like an empty bank account to make you absolutely loose your mind. I’ve had to be extra carful with my money lately and haven’t been able to do much shopping. I honestly think lack of money is bad for the mental health. When I say lack of money I mean in a very first world problem kind of way. Where being poor means you still got food on the table and a roof over your head but your diet consists of cup noodles and you’re sitting in your bed filling online shopping carts with all the clothes you wish you could buy, just to close the tabs an hour later and get back to reality.

My point is, when you’re trying to get through the cold dark months of winter you need every ounce of happiness you can get and yes, that sometimes comes in a shoppingbag. Retail-theraphy is REAL folks. Shopping makes you happy, end of story.

Something I’ve really been craving lately are flower embroidered  jeans. Paired with a basic white T-shirt and leather belt- So freakin’ pretty! The #1 wanies are from Gucci and too expensive for most people, including myself. But I was able to find some similar models from other brands.

If you’re crafty you could even buy embroidered flower patches and sew on an old pair of jeans. If that thought make you go “aint nobody got time fot that”, you can just have a look at these budget versions I’ve found of the gorgeous Gucci-jeans we all crave. (Click on the pictures to get to the link).

THE REAL DEAL

VS.

 TOPSHOP

ASOS

FacebookpinterestFacebookpinterest

Interior dreams

Hello dear friends!

Spring is getting closer and it’s making me long for some change. My home has always been very important to me. For some it might sound shallow but it’s actually the opposite. My home is my sanctuary, my safe space where I can relax and recharge my batteries. I love interior and making my home look pretty and homey. It’s like therapy for me. When I don’t feel satisfied with my home-situation I feel out of balance and as the libra that I am, I don’t deal well with my everyday life when I’m out of balance.

These past months I’ve been living with Bogdan in a very small room. We literally do the dishes in the bathroom sink because we have no kitchen. It’s been cozy and romantic and all but let’s face it, there is only that much “we are so in love, we only need each other, we could sleep in a tent and be happy” a person can take. Especially for the anxious, slightly spoiled princess that I am. Don’t get me wrong, I’d choose our love over a comfy home any day of the week but if I can have both don’t freakin’ mind if I do.

Between searching for apartments and contacting landlords I’ve drifted away onto interior websites and of course my dear old friend Pinterest. Even though I don’t know how our new home will look like I still find it ridiculously satisfying to plan the interior into the tiniest detail.

    
               
         
Source: Pinterest

 

FacebookpinterestFacebookpinterest

A STROLL AROUND COPENHAGEN


Hello dear friends!

I met with my friend Ekua earlier this week. We walked around in Copenhagen and had brunch at a really cozy café called Paludan. Definitely worth a visit if you´re in Copenhagen. It´s decorated as a library which is really cozy and they serve a magic cappuccino.

Excuse the bad picture quality. I thought I had put the camera on auto but it turned out it was night-mode. I didn’t realise it either so all the pictures look like shit. I promise I will learn how to use a camera so I can take proper pictures.

I must at least give myself some credit for not looking like I’m absolutely about to freeze to death in every picture. It was so cold this day and it even started snowing. I had to buy a sweater so I wouldn’t die (lame excuse for shopping I know).

Well, “vill man va fin får man lida pin”, Swedish saying that literally means if you want to be pretty you have to suffer. They don’t call us vikings for nothing.

Lots of love!

FacebookpinterestFacebookpinterest

Pinterest lately

Hello dear friends!

Judging from my recent Pinterest activity, I’m in desperate need of spring. This awful Scandinavian January-March weather is so horrible. It’s like three months of depression you just have to get through every year. Am I the only one who feel like I completely loose my sense of style when it’s cold? I just can’t dress as I want to because it’s simply too cold. I can not wait for the days when you can just throw on a light jacket and you’re good to go.

As the Pinterest nerd that I am I find there is no better way to cheer up than soaking up on inspirational sunny pictures. At least my mind gets to escape to warmer weather for a while. I hope it helps you too in the wait for sunnier days.

                      

 

FacebookpinterestFacebookpinterest